How to Support a Friend or Family Member Struggling with Mental Health

Witnessing a friend or family member grapple with mental health challenges can be incredibly difficult.

You want to help, but it's often hard to know where to start. Feelings of helplessness, fear of saying the wrong thing, and uncertainty about how to provide effective support are common.

The good news is that even small acts of kindness and understanding can make a significant difference. This comprehensive guide will provide you with practical advice and actionable steps to support your loved one on their journey to recovery and well-being.

Understanding Mental Health Challenges

Before diving into specific support strategies, it's important to understand the basics of mental health:

• Mental health is a spectrum: Just like physical health, mental health exists on a spectrum. Everyone experiences ups and downs, but when challenges become persistent and significantly impact daily life, it may indicate a mental health condition.

• Mental health conditions are common: Millions of people worldwide experience mental health challenges. It's not a sign of weakness or a character flaw.

• Various conditions exist: Mental health encompasses a wide range of conditions, including depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, eating disorders, and substance use disorders. Each condition has its own unique symptoms and treatment approaches.

• Stigma can be a barrier: Stigma surrounding mental health can prevent people from seeking help. Creating a supportive and understanding environment is crucial to breaking down these barriers.

• Recovery is possible: With appropriate treatment and support, many people with mental health conditions can live fulfilling and meaningful lives.

Recognising the Signs and Symptoms

Being able to recognise the signs and symptoms of mental health challenges is the first step in providing support. Some common indicators include:

• Changes in mood: Persistent sadness, irritability, anxiety or feelings of emptiness.

• Changes in behaviour: Withdrawal from social activities, changes in sleep or appetite, increased substance use, or engaging in risky behaviours.

• Difficulty concentrating: Trouble focusing, remembering things or making decisions.

• Physical symptoms: Unexplained aches, pains, headaches or digestive problems.

• Changes in thinking: Negative thoughts, feelings of hopelessness, or thoughts of self-harm or suicide.

• Extreme emotional reactions: Overreacting to minor situations or experiencing intense mood swings.

• Decline in personal care: Neglecting hygiene, appearance or responsibilities.

It's important to note that these symptoms can vary depending on the individual and the specific condition.

If you notice any of these signs in your friend or family member, it's important to approach them with compassion and concern.

How to Offer Support: Practical Strategies

Here are some practical strategies you can use to support a friend or family member who is struggling with their mental health:

1. Listen without Judgement:

• Create a Safe Space: Let your loved one know that you're there to listen without judgement or criticism. Create a safe and confidential space where they feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and feelings.

• Practice Active Listening: Pay attention to what they're saying, both verbally and nonverbally. Make eye contact, nod your head, and use encouraging words like "I understand" or "That sounds difficult."

• Resist the Urge to Interrupt: Let them finish speaking before you respond. Avoid interrupting or offering unsolicited advice.

• Validate Their Feelings: Acknowledge and validate their feelings, even if you don't fully understand them. Let them know that their emotions are valid and that you're there to support them.

2. Offer Practical Help:

• Identify Their Needs: Ask your loved one what kind of support they need. This could include help with everyday tasks, transportation to appointments, or simply someone to talk to.

• Offer Specific Assistance: Instead of offering general help like "Let me know if you need anything," offer specific assistance. For example, "Can I drive you to your therapy appointment on Tuesday?" or "Would you like me to help you with grocery shopping?"

• Respect Their Boundaries: Respect their boundaries and don't push them to accept help if they're not ready.

3. Encourage Professional Help:

• Normalize Seeking Help: Emphasize that seeking professional help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

• Provide Information: Offer information about mental health professionals, treatment options, and support groups.

• Offer to Help with Research: Assist them with researching therapists, psychiatrists, or treatment facilities.

• Offer to Accompany Them: Offer to accompany them to their first appointment for support.

4. Educate Yourself:

• Learn About Their Condition: Educate yourself about their specific mental health condition. This will help you understand their symptoms, treatment options, and challenges they may face.

• Reliable Resources: Use reliable resources to gather information.

• Avoid Misinformation: Be wary of misinformation or stereotypes about mental health.

5. Be Patient and Understanding:

• Recovery Takes Time: Understand that recovery from mental health challenges takes time and effort. There will be ups and downs along the way.

• Avoid Pressuring Them: Avoid pressuring them to "snap out of it" or "just be positive." These statements can be invalidating and unhelpful.

• Celebrate Small Victories: Celebrate small victories and progress, no matter how small they may seem.

6. Challenge Stigma:

• Speak Out Against Stigma: Speak out against stigma and discrimination related to mental health.

• Share Personal Stories: Share personal stories about mental health challenges to help break down barriers and promote understanding.

• Use Respectful Language: Use respectful and person-centered language when talking about mental health. Avoid using derogatory terms or labels.

7. Maintain Your Own Well-being:

• Set Boundaries: Set boundaries to protect your own mental and emotional well-being. It's important to take care of yourself so you can effectively support your loved one.

• Seek Support for Yourself: Seek support from friends, family, or a therapist. Supporting someone with mental health challenges can be emotionally draining, so it's important to have your own support system.

• Practice Self-Care: Engage in self-care activities that help you relax and recharge. This could include exercise, meditation, spending time in nature, or pursuing hobbies.

What Not to Say: Phrases to Avoid

While your intentions may be good, some phrases can be unintentionally harmful or invalidating. Avoid saying the following:

• "Just snap out of it."

• "It's all in your head."

• "You're just looking for attention."

• "Everyone feels sad sometimes."

• "You have nothing to be depressed about."

• "Pull yourself together."

• "Have you tried yoga/meditation/exercise?" (While these activities can be helpful, they're not a substitute for professional treatment.)

• "I know how you feel." (Unless you have personally experienced the same condition, it's best to avoid this phrase.)

When to Seek Professional Help on Their Behalf

In some cases, your loved one may be unable or unwilling to seek help for themselves. If you're concerned about their safety or well-being, you may need to take action on their behalf.

• Imminent Danger: If they're expressing thoughts of self-harm or suicide, or if they're a danger to themselves or others, seek immediate help. Contact emergency services, take them to the nearest hospital, or call a crisis hotline.

• Severe Symptoms: If their symptoms are severe and significantly impacting their daily life, and they're refusing treatment, you may need to consider seeking a mental health assessment.

• Legal Options: In some cases, you may need to explore legal options such as involuntary commitment. Consult with a mental health professional or lawyer to understand your rights and options.

TouchBase: Staying Connected and Showing You Care

Even small gestures of connection can make a big difference in the life of someone struggling with mental health. TouchBase can help you:

• Remember Important Dates: Never miss a birthday, anniversary or appointment.

• Schedule Regular Check-Ins: Set reminders to reach out to your loved one regularly, even if it's just for a quick chat.

• Keep Track of Conversations: Note important details from your conversations so you can remember what's important to them and follow up on their progress.

By using TouchBase to stay connected and show your care, you can provide a valuable source of support and encouragement.

Resources for Mental Health Support

Here are some helpful resources for mental health support in various countries:

United Kingdom:

• NHS: The National Health Service provides a wide range of mental health services, including therapy, medication, and crisis support.

• Mind: Mind is a leading mental health charity that provides information, support, and advocacy.

• Rethink Mental Illness: Rethink Mental Illness is a charity that provides support and information to people affected by mental illness.

• Samaritans: Samaritans provides confidential emotional support 24 hours a day.

• CALM (Campaign Against Living Miserably): CALM provides support to men who are feeling down or suicidal.

• YoungMinds: YoungMinds provides support to young people and their families.

United States of America:

• National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI): NAMI provides education, support, and advocacy for individuals and families affected by mental illness.

• Mental Health America (MHA): MHA works to promote mental health and prevent mental illness through advocacy, education, research, and service.

• Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA): SAMHSA is a federal agency that provides information and resources on mental health and substance abuse.

• The Trevor Project: The Trevor Project provides crisis intervention and suicide prevention services to LGBTQ young people.

• Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 to connect with a crisis counselor.

India:

• AASRA: AASRA is a suicide prevention helpline that offers support to individuals in distress.

• Vandrevala Foundation for Mental Health: This foundation operates a 24/7 helpline offering crisis intervention and support.

• The MINDS Foundation: Works to improve mental health access and reduce stigma in rural India.

• National Institute of Mental Health and Neuro Sciences (NIMHANS): A leading institution for mental health research and treatment in India.

Australia:

• Beyond Blue: Provides information and support for anxiety, depression, and suicide prevention.

• Lifeline: Offers 24-hour crisis support and suicide prevention services.

• Headspace: Provides mental health services for young people aged 12-25.

• Black Dog Institute: A research institute focused on understanding, preventing, and treating mental illness.

• SANE Australia: Offers support and information for people with complex mental health issues, their families and friends.

Final Thoughts: You Are Not Alone

Supporting a friend or family member who is struggling with mental health can be challenging, but it's also incredibly rewarding.

By offering your love, support, and understanding, you can make a significant difference in their life. Remember that you are not alone, and there are resources available to help you and your loved one navigate this journey.

What's one thing you can do today to support a friend or family member who is struggling with their mental health?